Connections of this World

In nature everything is connected.  Every organisms' actions have an affect on another organism.  Whether it's simple things like one animals kill feeding others or complex things like a fiddler's crab's burrows allowing mangroves to flourish.  Humans are a part of nature too.  We need to connect with other humans and other organisms.  It is the connections that allow life to flourish and enrich our lives.  Life on earth is a great experience but we need to experience it with others not cut off.  The world around us is one giant community sharing energy and resources.  Each member's strength makes the community strong.  All the world is energy and when that energy is used with love it brings about positivity for all even if it may not seem like a positive experience to the individual in the grand scheme of the universe it is.  Look around at nature not as a cutthroat competition but as a community where each gets their turn and has different experiences and allows others to have their turn.  When organisms get cut off from the community then there is hurt.  When individual rights and wills are broken or violated so their is suffering.  We can learn from nature that each organism is entitled to live life the best they can and pursue the lives they want.  When we respect ourselves and our lives and others and their lives then connections are made, experiences enriched and life is in balance.  

The Great Mystery

The Lakota used the term The Great Mystery to describe an all encompassing life force that pervaded all the living things and all the earth.  I have always liked that term because it implies that we will never fully know the reasons for things.  There will always be mystery to life.  Modern human culture often tries to find answers to everything.  Scientific advances are always breaking new frontiers.  Manipulating genetic coding, trying to create artificial intelligence, exploring the furthest reaches of space, ect.  These kinds of advances in human ingenuity and understanding have propelled our society forward and many times they spur on a sense of wonder.  But despite all this there is much left unexplained and unknown.  A hundred years ago the things we know and have at our disposal today would have seemed unfathomable.  The problems of today would also probably never cross anyone's mind as remotely possible a hundred years ago.  Who knows what a hundred years from now we will know and have and who knows what problems will face us.  

But perhaps just maybe life and the forces that govern it are supposed to be a great mystery.  Perhaps there are some things humans are not meant to know.  Perhaps there are some things humans are not meant to do.  Perhaps there are some places humans were not meant to go.  Perhaps instead we should trust the mystery of the universe.  

I always liked a line from the movie Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle where one of the characters says "left to it's own devices the universe tends to unfold as it should".  I think that is true.  The universe is believed to be about 12- 14 billion years old or perhaps older.  It's time scale would be inconceivable to us.  Like a fruit fly whose life span is 40-50 days would not be able to conceive of our life span.  So I believe even though it may not seem it the universe and everything in it will eventually unfold as it should.  We just have to play our parts and as a favorite television special of my youth used to say "let up a little on the wonder why and give your heart a try".  Ours is not to know but to walk and grow.  How the universe gets where it's going is a mystery perhaps meant for only it to know.      

The Role of Anger

Anger can be a pretty controversial emotion.  It certainly can be destructive as the myriad cases of abuse clearly show.  Many cite health risks as a result of anger.  Many religious disciplines try to teach us how to control and let go of our anger.  But what does nature teach us about anger?

In nature animals get angry all the time.  Sometimes they are in pain and will lash out at others to let them know to leave them alone.  Other times they get angry at rivals or those wishing to do them harm.  However the anger always seems to serve a purpose and is short lived.  The anger fuels adrenaline to them to take action to get a message across which is usually along the lines of don't mess with me.  It burns hot and fast and then is over with once the competition is over or the message has been delivered.  All parties continue to go about there business.  Sometimes their may be hurt feelings which can be mediated out by a third party but usually everyone understands it's momentary necessity and can work past it.  In nature it is almost like anger is a powerful weapon to be used only when necessary and not for lengthy periods of time. Kind of like a power-up in a video game that gives you extra powers to help you in the game but only lasts for a finite amount of time.  

So it seems that nature instructs us that anger isn't necessarily bad as long as it is used sparingly and for a purpose that is needed and then quickly let go.  So I try to think of anger has a hot blade.  I can hold it and use it if I absolutely need to.  It can be a useful tool to spur me on to action to address a problem but I can't hold it for too long or I will be burned so I must drop it quickly after it has served it's purpose.  Perhaps that purpose is addressing feelings I have put off or seeking justice or confronting an issue.  Whatever it may be anger can help that's why it is given to us like all emotions but like all emotions don't hold it for too long.  It's a powerful and volatile one after all. 

No Expectations

As I have written in a previous post it is helpful to try and stay in the moment and animals in my humble opinion are great teachers of staying in the moment.  But always staying present isn't completely practical.  Even animals have to occasionally plan for the future.   Squirrels hide away their nuts and beavers build their dams and get them ready for winter.  But I think letting go of expectations of the future is where the difference lies between animals and many of us modern day humans.  And the more I observed this the more it seemed the animals had the right idea and had better peace of mind.

When I walk with my dogs their is usually a general route that they follow but we definitely veer off for various reasons.  Sometimes they add on extensions or we veer because they picked up the sent of something.  Perhaps I turn them because something that will upset them is coming up on our usual route.  Observing on these walks has taught me that you can't guarantee what's going to come your way.  You have a general trajectory but it is always in flux.  I noticed that it seems all animals have a general plan but are always making adjustments.  For instance as this article describes the hunting tactics of the wolf are constantly changing as they test and reevaluate the situation.  Is there weak and vulnerable prey, what is the best tactic for take down, do they wait it out or go on to another hunt, ect.  But at the same time the hunt is carefully planned they are not just wildly running in trying to kill the first animal they come across.

I have tried using this tact of planning but always making adjustments in my life.  Perhaps you get the promotion perhaps you don't, perhaps you go to college perhaps you don't, perhaps you get married perhaps you don't.  We are conditioned in modern society to always hit certain milestones.  We have to advance our career and settle down and get married and get a home and start a family usually by a certain age.  Which if that's what you want to do there is nothing wrong with planning to do that and setting out with that objective but like my dogs be prepared to be veered off course by other developments I have learned.  Maybe you get married later.  Or maybe not at all due to some circumstances.  Maybe you start your whole career path over again.  Maybe you get divorced and have to start dating in middle age again.  Maybe a great opportunity has you moving to a brand new country.  All different circumstance can make us have to reevaluate and change directions.

When you get right down to it all organisms on earth are trying to find food and water, breathe, and reproduce.  Essentially that is it.  The myriad ways in which organisms do these things is the beauty and majesty of life on this planet.  We humans are also essentially doing these things but we add on so many additional things that we forget what the essentials are.  As long as you have the essentials you can chart your own individual path to happiness and when a path you weren't planning on traveling springs up before you enjoy it.  It is just a unique way to achieve the essentials of life like our fellow earthlings have charted new paths to achieve these things.  So I try to take a page from our animal brethren and be open to new developments.  It's hard many of the times but in truth we all have our own particular paths to walk.  As a famous song states "sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind.  The race is long and in the end, it's only with yourself".

Why Did the Geese Cross the Road?

I was walking once in park.  The park had a road running through it that was a regular road used by motorist.  It wasn't the busiest road but it had a fair number of cars travel it.  While walking I noticed a group of geese on one side of the road.  Or a gaggle if you will.  Geese live in a group which makes them social but as this article explains their is flexibility for individuality as well.  I watched the geese eat grass on one side of the road.  Eventually one of the geese carefully crossed the road.  I suppose there was more grass on the other side of the road to graze on.  After the one goose successfully crossed the road another goose followed and also crossed the road.  Then two more crossed road.  More and more slowly waddled across the road until all of them had crossed.  All because the one took the chance and braved the road.  And then another was brave and decided to follow.  And then others decided to be brave and follow and so on.  Until all the geese had crossed the road to greener pastures so to speak.  That is a demonstration of leadership out of individuality.  One is brave and does something different based on their individual assessment, others then are brave and follow that individual based on their own assessment which then causes others to join in.  That is a lesson in leadership that has always stuck with me.  Does anyone else have any examples of leadership they would like to share?  

Essence of the Thing

People have things and they take pride in those things.  Our stuff can often be a representation of our interests and personality.  Or they can be useful tools.  Nothing wrong with stuff to give us joy in life.  But lately it seems stuff is more imprisoning many of us than letting our heart sore and helping us live our lives.  Many in our modern culture are often conditioned to always want something new and shiny.  We are constantly buying new phones, cars, clothes, TVs, computers, furniture, ect.  We have to upgrade our technology or buy warranties in case our screen has a scratch in it.  We are always under pressure to fix up our homes and yards or get new outfits to wear or have the latest gadgets.  I have seen people be crestfallen at a 6 inch scratch on their car.  According to an entire movie about happiness stuff doesn't equate to happiness though and many of the happiest people have very little.

How do animals react to their stuff.  You only have to try to take away a dogs favorite toy to know that animals can become possessive of things.  But they seem to just enjoy the essence of their things.  I have seen a dog have a great time with a stitched up mangled stuffed animal.  I have played with a dog with a dirty disgusting looking rope toy that was left outside for who knows how long.  The dog didn't care what it looked like it was still fun for her to play with.  I have played tug of war with my own dogs with a scrap of fabric that you would never guess was once part of a stuffed squirrel.  The fabric stilled served the purpose of us having a good tug of war.  I have seen a dog have the time of its life with less than a half of a rubber ball.    

And it's not just dogs that love simple toys just for the essence of it being something to play with.  Try crumpling up a piece of paper and throwing it for a cat.  It was one of my cat's favorite toys when I was growing up.  Chimpanzee's play with sticks as well as use various things for tools and they seem to make do with what they have to get the job done.  This article tells of crocodiles playing with flowers, cichlids playing with thermometers, and octopuses playing with empty pill bottles.  

These animals take joy in the simple things and they take objects that aren't food as what they are rather than elevating them beyond what use they can be to them.  If it is a toy than they have fun with it even if it is simple or not in good condition.  As long as they can have fun with it.  The essence of a toy after all is just something to enjoy.  Human children do this too.  They can still play with dolls and action figures if they are missing limbs.  They can use their imagination with none toy objects like pencils and erasers and have fun with them.  Many children love a toy so much it gets damaged and looks pretty thread bear but it still brings joy to them so they don't care.  As we grow up for some reason we seem to put more stock in what something looks like or how new it is rather than just enjoying what we have.  

And if it is a useful tool animals use it until it is no longer useful to them.  Chimpanzees our closest animal relative and fellow tool user doesn't seem to become obsessed with their tools they use them as long as they are useful and then move on.  Perhaps this more lighthearted play and practical tool use that animals and human children seem to know can lighten adult human hearts and free us to take more joy in life.

Fake It Till You Make It

The honey badger is a mammal that measures about 23 to 28 cm (9.1 to 11.0 in) from ground to shoulder and 55–77 cm (22–30 in) in length on average.  Here is a video of a honey badger standing up to a lion.  You can look up tons of videos and pictures of the honey badger standing up to all kinds of deadly animals from wolverines to hyenas to lions to snakes.  So how does a honey badger do this?  Well part of the trick has to do with the extremely tough skin of the honey badger.  But its more than that.  The honey badger appears fearless when meeting these deadly predators.  You see in nature it's all about confidence and how you present yourself and the honey badgers know how to present themselves. 

Animals don't want to get into fights unless they have to.  That's because a fight could result in injury or death.  And in the wild if you get injured that could be a big problem.  Animals can't go to the doctor and take time off from work.  An injury in the wild could leave you vulnerable to attack from a predator or leave you unable to hunt or get food.  Or it could get infected.  So if at all possible most animals avoid actually fighting.  The stakes have to be high to be worth the risk.  So instead animals posture.  They brandish their weapons, take up space, show dominant actions, demonstrate their strength, some make a bunch of noise, ect.  All to show that they have what it takes to go the distance and win the fight.  They are basically trying to prove that they will be willing to fight if they have to and that they will win the fight or at the very least not be worth the fight because they will do so much damage to their opponent.

All animals posture and try to demonstrate confidence but the honey badger is such an expert at this that it can convince lions and hyenas to back off.  The wolverine is also an animal known to take on much larger and powerful animals when it comes to food using sheer confidence and assertiveness.  So maybe we can take a page from animals such as the honey badger and the wolverine when we are faced with a challenge or an obstacle or a task that seems out of our league.  We can show confidence and act like we can take it on.  When people asked one of my human teachers in life if he could do a task he had never done before he was fond of responding with "I can do it at least as good as the person currently doing it the worst".  What he meant was that he may not be the best at it but he can certainly figure out how to do it.  That confidence and willingness took him far in life and allowed him a variety of experiences.

Now you might be saying well building up confidence is one thing but we can't posture ourselves into confidence like animals can.  Actually studies show we can.  This article talks about the work of Amy Cuddy  who has found evidence that just being in a confident and assertive posture(ie one that takes up space) will boost your confidence even after you are no longer in the posture.  Here is a TED Talk where Amy Cuddy states that doing an assertive posture for 2min before an interview will increase your chances of success.  I personally since first seeing this video have taken her advice before interviews and have yet to not get a job offer.

So perhaps the animal kingdom is onto something.  Our bodies are not just machines controlled by the mind but instead work together with the mind.  Everything in nature is in relation to everything else however indirectly it may be.  So why would our bodies and minds be any different.  So let them work together.  Be confident in body posture and mind confidence will follow along with skill.  And just like the wolverine and honey badger when we act like we can do something we can achieve amazing things.    

Bonds of Trust Create Connections

We here on this planet we call earth trying to survive.  That's all any of us are here to do.  Everything else is extra.  Whether we are trying to earn money, raise a family, build a business, have fun with friends, create art, or help others our main goal is to survive for as long and as successfully as we can.  But no matter how hard we try to survive and how successful we are at it we will eventually die and leave this earth.  Our bodies will remain behind on this plant. Our soul(if you believe in one) goes somewhere else.  And our mind, the interface between our bodies of this earth and a soul if you believe in one, just shuts down.  

What is left behind on this earth besides our bodies made of matter are the connections we make while here.  All animals including the animal known as human strive to make these connections.  These connects are complicated and very complex.  They can be difficult to put into words but they are based on bonds of trust.  My two dogs spend more time together than I probably spend with anyone.  They have a unique relationship that belongs to just them.  I don't know what it is because it is there's alone.  It is one based on trust and I am sure it is fluid but it is one they made and it stands strong in their lives.  These are the types of connections I am referring to when I say connections.  They are intimate relationships built on trust and respect that are fluid but strong.  They are two hearts touching.  You know when you have them.  They aren't based on bloodlines or geographic proximity or past circumstances.  Although that stuff may be a component it is only a starting point.  True connections are something far more.

Social animals such as humans strive to make these connections even harder than non social animals but all make them.  The solitary mammals like bears or tigers still make connections with their young.  Social animals such as wolves and chimpanzees will make connections with members of their own group.  Connections can be made across gender and age as well as species.  Any human who has truly bonded with an animal knows that the heart can cross specie barriers.  But animals can bond with other species besides humans.  There is the case of the bear, lion and tiger who are all friends.  The stray cat and the lynx who are best buds at a zoo.  Then there was the goat who just couldn't live without his burro friend.  Then the famous case of a lion who remembered his human friends after a year of being rehabilitated in the wild.  You can see many of these stories on internet websites such as this one of cases of cross species friendships both in the wild and in domestication.

This drive for connection exists because that is what makes life interesting.  That is what we remember and take with us.  The connections teach us things, warm our heart, and make our time here all the more fruitful and enjoyable.  The connections can be brief or life long.  Think back on your life and my guess if you are like me the connections you made with others will be the memories that are the strongest.  We remember those we meet along our path. They stay with us long after our paths have gone separate ways. Their spirits linger in our hearts.  

Whether they were bad or good we can learn from them and cherish the good parts and learn from the bad.  We teach them and they teach us.  We can cry with them or laugh with them.  We can share and we can have fun.  Or we can just stand with them to support.  There were two people who wanted to film wolves so they raised a pack of wolves and observed them and then after the project the wolves were relocated to a Native American reservation.  When the wolves were released in their new territory the omega was too scared to come out of the his cage even though the rest of the pack was already out.  So his littermate who was also the alpha male of the pack walked over to the omega's cage and they whimpered and sniffed to each other and then the omega cautiously stepped out and his brother pressed his shoulder against his and the two of them walked out into their new territory together. We all need someone at times to brave this life and continue walking it's journey.  

Now sometimes attempts at connections don't work or connections eventually fade away or may become toxic so that is why you want to choose them carefully and respect others choices.  We all get to choose our connections in this life.  But whatever connections you choose make them and however long they last treasure them and enjoy them.  Make sure they are real connections not false ones and make as many as you want.  I once asked a 90 year old man if he had any words of wisdom after 90 years.  He responded with a fart joke but after he laughed he paused looked off and said "Just relax and enjoy those around you".  So lets all enjoy humans and non-human relationships.  We all need them after all.  I would love to connect with any of you so please feel free to leave comments or follow me on twitter or leave your email address or all of the above if you wish :)  Feel free to share stories of your own profound connections as well!

Forgive and Let Go

Forgiveness is a difficult thing for us humans.  I know I struggled with it over the years and still sometimes have trouble to this day.  When I speak of forgiveness I don't mean necessarily forgetting the wrong that was done to you and having no consequences for the action.  I mean letting go of negative feelings and hostilities towards the other party.  By doing this you let go of resentment, anger and desire for vengeance.  This article helps explain what I mean by forgiveness and how it benefits the one who forgives.  You can forgive someone and still stay away from them or hold them accountable for their actions and take the necessary steps to protect yourself from further harm.  But you free yourself and no longer hold any negative feelings towards them.  It is a difficult thing to do.

Animals seem to do this well and I have often used them as teachers for me to model this kind of forgiveness.  When animals fight their may be anger to get the adrenaline pumping during the fight but after it's over it's over and each individual moves on with their lives trying to survive the best they can.  An example of this was in a documentary I watched about a female tiger.  Tigers are solitary animals.  The females live in territorial boundaries usually by themselves to raise their cubs.  The male tigers also have territorial boundaries and their territory is larger than the females territory and will usually encompass several females who he will mate with.  In this documentary the female tiger already had cubs but a male who was not the cubs father had taken over the territory and wanted to kill the cubs and mate with this female.  The female of course protected her young and fought the male tiger.  The fight was brutal and quick and the female one.  The male went off to nurse his wounds.  Some time later after the female tiger's cubs had grown and left to start lives of their own the male tiger and the female tiger mated for many consecutive years and the male tiger was often in the company of this female tiger.  Another words the two tigers had a difference in goals(one wanted to mate the other wanted to finish raising her current cubs) and they fought to decide whose will would prevail.  After the fight they went on living their lives.  The male did his thing hunting and mating with other females and the female did her thing continuing to care for her children and raise them to be successful tigers on their own.  No grudges held.  No resentment.  No revenge.  When their wills lined up they formed a long lasting and very successful partnership.  They lived in the moment and adjusted to the circumstances.  There was no cruelty for the sake of cruelty when they fought they were just both doing their thing.

As I explained in a previous post this can be seen all the time in primates as well.  Living in social groups means friction is bound to cause spats but they cool down and reconcile and move on.  Animals understand that they have to survive and do what they need to do to survive.  When they comes in conflict with another their may be a fight but afterwards each gets to go on their way(assuming the fight wasn't to the death which very often it's not) to continue living.  And they can reconcile and still work together if the need arises based on conditions.  Now of course if repeated cruelty or violence was done it may have lasting affects.  You hear stories of pets who can act aggressive to a former abuser but this is rare.  Most of the time even when animals come across abuse they learn to trust again and want to forgive and believe the best.

So I try to take my cue from animals.  When someone does something that upsets me or I feel wrongs me I try to reconcile and let it go so I hold no ill will to them.  If it is repeated cruelty or abuse then I leave the situation and defend myself but try to hold on to the hope that the other person can find peace even if it isn't with me.  For each of us are trying to survive the best we can and holding onto hate just poisons our own self.  Letting go frees ourself to continue to live our lives the best we can and allows the others in the community of life to do the same.

What struggles with forgiveness have you encountered?  I would love to hear about them since as I said I know first hand how difficult this task can be and I feel sharing can help everyone to become better at it.      

Changing Seasons

Science tells us why the seasons change and different parts of the world experience different amounts of sunlight.  But I find the changing in the seasons in nature and the variations in daylight as reminders that all things change.  As we live our lives change is inevitable.  We go through periods and cycles just like everything else on the earth.  Some of those periods are marked with struggle and some of those periods are marked with joy.  Nothing stays the same and we are all constantly in motion.  So we must accept that things change in our lives and that we go through new periods and experience new experiences.

Everyone must have their time in the sun so to speak.  The seasons change and some animals do better in the long summer days.  While others thrive in the cold of winter.  The darkness sometimes wins over light and at other times in the year light prevails over darkness but equilibrium and balance is always achieved during the equinox.  That is what life is after all a balance so everyone gets their turn and shares in the joys and travails of this planet.  We just have to remember to accept the good and the bad in turn, even though it can be very hard at times.  I find it helps to keep in mind what is good for one individual is bad for another.  Rain might ruin your softball game plans but it helps the plants grow for instance.  A preys death means food for potentially many others in nature.  

So I have learned from these cycles of the earth that sometimes bad stuff happens and sometimes good stuff.  Sometimes I am ahead and sometimes I am behind.  But there is no race in reality just a journey that is yours and yours alone.  One set of conditions and circumstances will give way to another set.  I have to learn to ride these cycles as they come like the ocean waves.  Take what I can get from each moment and allow others to have their moments too, trusting that their will always be balance.  For balance is truly the natural state of things on this earth.

What changes did you have to endure?  Did you ever have a bad situation turn out to be good or vice versa?  How did you overcome the bad and learn to embrace the good.  It can be a difficult thing and takes practice I know so I would love to hear some stories :)

Different Personalities See the World Differently

I have worked many jobs over the years.  One of them being a kennel assistant at a pet boarding facility.  Working that job taught me many things.  One being how differently we all react to stress.  Some of the boarders reacted with defiance by flipping over their food or water dish.  Others went on a hunger strike.  Some wouldn't eat while inside their cages.  Others would just cower in the back of their cages or sit there shaking.  Still others would become hyper and easily agitated and riled up.  Some would follow protocol exactly while others resisted.  Some lashed out and some barked.  Others whined.  Some just wanted pets and to be held.  Others wanted to play.  I remember one that was sick and I tried to approach and to console her but she got nervous and agitated with me there.  I realized sometimes the best thing you can do to help is let another be.

The different personalities of these animals and their emotions while in the situation of being left in a strange place was clear to me.  The various ways they reacted showed me that each individual is unique and will react to the world around them uniquely.  Just interacting with these animals, observing them and being open to what they were experiencing and feeling was enough to show me that animals have emotional lives and different personalities like humans.  I didn't need to read scientific studies to know that animals are living sentient beings.  Although for the record I have also read many articles and various studies on animal intelligence and personalities.

The different ways these animals reacted to stress and fear and uncertainty helped me understand myself and other humans better as well.  We humans live in a very stressful and confusing world. We humans cope with stress in a myriad of different ways too just like the boarders.  Whether that's by working out at the gym, using legal drugs like caffeine or alcohol or illegal drugs, or we escape into a fantasy world with books, TV or video games.  We sometimes get angry and lash out or cry or just become frozen unable to move forward in life.  Sometimes we express ourselves others bottle it up and stay stoic.  We all have our own ways of coping.

We have to be acknowledging of these differences no two individuals are alike.  Too many factors go in to making an individual for the combination to ever come out exact twice.  So these differences need to be acknowledged and utilized.  Becoming aware of how you react to stress can help you better cope and address what is stressing you.  You can then put your energies towards positive growth and outcomes.  Becoming better aware of how others react to stress can help you deal with people.  You can realize that they are reacting to fear or loneliness or whatever is bothering them.  When you realize they are stressed you can better address the root cause than the actual behavior.  While working with stressed dogs or cats you have to be vigilant that their behavior is symptomatic and how best can you put them at ease so you can work together and help each other.  We humans can do that for both the human and non-humans in our life.  We can become more aware of ourselves and others and how our feelings and reactions to those feelings play out.  Compassion for others and ourselves can develop through that awareness.  And with that compassion we can build bridges to unite and solve problems and connect.  Connecting with one another is how we accomplish great things and is one of our main objectives here in this life.  

Animals helped show me how different we all are and how similar we all are despite those differences.  Within those similarities and differences we can find understanding and awareness of each other.  Awareness is the key to healing, change, happiness and freedom.

Come Together

So many times we feel we must master so many things.  There is a push to be good at school, sports, work, parenting, home repairs, yard work, cooking, cleaning, ect.  The do it yourself mentality is that you can learn anything and do it yourself without being reliant on someone else and this is how you gain independence.  But humans are social animals so we were never meant to go it alone.  A solitary animal may have to master a variety of things to survive but a social animal doesn't necessarily have to do it.  Instead a social animal has to master working together with others and then they can let their natural skill set shine through and help out the group.  There independence comes not from doing everything themselves but instead from feeling comfortable being themselves within a group without feeling like they have to lose their identity within the group or dominate the group.  Everyone has a niche to fill. The differences brought to the table and the ability to coordinate them are what makes the group strong.

Wolves are a great examples of this idea of everyone being comfortable within a group and coming together to each play their role.  Although you hear a lot about the omega and alpha roles there are really a myriad of roles that wolves can play within the pack.  We are only now beginning to understand these roles.  For instance an alpha male and female lead a pack of wolves.  It is their job to lead hunts and come up with the strategies for the hunts.  They are also responsible for keeping up territorial boundaries.  They set out general policy for the pack as well.  In a small pack they may take on other roles but in a larger pack this would pretty much be the extent of their duties.  They are not necessarily the biggest wolves they are wolves that set out on their own to brave what was out there to find a mate and start a pack.  They have natural leadership skills and strength of will.  But the other members are just as important to the sustainability of a pack.  Betas are the largest and strongest.  Their job is to enforce and keep order in the pack.  They enforce the policies of the alphas.  Then there is the nanny a special wolf that is selected for this very important job to take over the care of the pups and look after them after the wolf pups are weened so the alpha female can go back to her duties.  There are the mid-ranking wolves whose job it is to confuse the numbers of the pack and make it seem larger than it really is to deter enemies.  They are also wary and help alert the pack of any potential dangers.  Other wolves have jobs of teaching and disciplining other wolves. There are speciality positions such as runners that are fast to outrun prey.  Still other wolves are specially talented to take down prey for the kill.  And the often misunderstood omega is not a lowly member of the pack but a very vital member of the pack that diffuses tension and calms situations by taking a lot of the aggression out of the pack.  Also they move members of the pack around a carcass.  Certain parts of the animal provide certain functions for instance vital organs provide a strong scent for the alphas.  When the omega is chased off the carcass it allows the wolves to change positions so they can eat what best suits their role.  But after the other wolves have finished the omega is allowed to partake of some high quality piece of the carcass saved by the beta wolves.

Wolves are highly social animals just like humans.  They know they can't all be alphas or omegas or nannies. They each have a specific skill that comes naturally to them and they bring that skill to the table and they allow others to bring their skills too.  They each stay within their role and execute it to the best of their abilities.  They work together and cooperate knowing that their own weaknesses will be covered up by other's strengths just like their strengths will cover up other's weaknesses.  And what happens when they do this?  Where does pooling their strengths and each playing their part get them?  A wolf pack is formed which is one of the most formidable forces of nature.  It can take down large animals that only larger predators should be able to take down, it can fight bears off, and it can change ecosystems.

When social animals work together and cooperate amazing things can happen.  What things do you bring to the table?  What amazing feats have you accomplished working in a group?  Humans often come together for finite period of times to create things such as buildings or movies.  Not everyone is an architect, a plumber, an electrician ect. but when everyone works together huge skyscrapers can erect.  Same with movies not everyone is an actor or a director or a writer but when all different people with different talents come together a great movie is made.  Imagine if humans worked together and each played their part in other areas of life.  Imagine what we can all accomplish when we see all that a wolf pack can accomplish.  Humans can come together and create strong bonds together to forge the life they want and achieve great things.  The potential is there and it is great.  Remember a lone wolf howling is calling out to other wolves but a group of wolves howling is a declaration of solidarity and strength crying out to the world the power of each individual coming together to form something greater than they could ever be by themselves.

Take Your Time

I sometimes feel I am a Type A striving to be a Type B.  Back in my youth I used to take pride in myself that I was always running around getting stuff done.  I was praised back then for getting stuff done quickly.  But having dogs taught me to move slower.  My dogs are nervous dogs and when I move quickly in makes them nervous.  Dog behaviorists taught me to slow down when around dogs.  Fast movements make them nervous they told me.  This lesson was driven home while working at a boarding facility where there were lots of nervous dogs.  When I rushed around trying to get stuff done it made them more agitated and they grew more nervous.  As I watched animals in nature the reason for this began making sense.  Animals often move slowly.  Whether they are patrolling territory or grazing on vegetation.  They are always highly alert looking out for danger or opportunity but they move slowly until danger or opportunity presented itself.

I had two human teachers at different times in my life each give me half of the reason.  The one teacher was trying to teach me martial arts and was explaining to me that you can be alert and relaxed at the same time and that is truly how you counter a threat.  Too rigid and tense he explained will make you unable to counter a move and go with a fluid situation.  Not alert and you won't be able to see what's coming when a threat comes at you.  The other teacher was working on a show with me.  I was young still and running around ping ponging all over the place trying to do stuff and he said to me "Slow down and relax there are very few life and death situations in this life you will know when you are in one".  It wasn't till years later when I was in a life and death situation that I realized he was right.  Both these teachers expressed what the animal kingdom already knows.  When it's a life and death situation you move quickly and react.  In nature that can be many forms such as a hungry predator coming after you or a rival or maybe you need to catch prey yourself.  In all those instances quick action is taken but otherwise animals stay alert but relaxed and move slowly taking everything in until the moment requires action.  They are relaxed yet alert.  Those human teachers of mine were trying to get me to calm down and relax so I can take in my environment appropriately.  I had to gain confidence in myself to know that I would know when something needed a quick response.  And the dogs I worked with and the two I live with continue to remind me of that lesson.  When I move too quickly they think it's a life and death situation so I try to take my time.  

We only get one life we need to take it in and relax.  Staying aware but relaxed is the best way to take in everything this life has to offer and accomplish the most we can in our finite time on this planet.  Too tense and moving too quickly we will miss out.  We have to stop and smell the roses so to speak.  So until the moment of action is upon you enjoy the ride and savor and than snatch opportunity or defend yourself when the moment manifests. 

Compromising Plants

Some of the most profound lessons I have learned from nature have come from the plant kingdom.  As I learned more and more about plants I realized their was a lot to learn from them and that they were really quite advanced.  Jane Goodall in her book Seeds of Hope: Wisdom and Wonder from the World of Plants talks about the plant kingdom and how complex they are and the positive force they can be.  She even relates in her book a story of a friend of hers that composed a song while sitting under a tree.  He then performed that song for a local indigenous tribe.  Afterwards he told them that he felt the song was told to him by the tree he was sitting under at the time.  The tribe told him the location of the exact tree he was referring to.  When the man asks them how they knew they replied that all trees have personalities and they recognized that tree's personality in his song.  

One lesson that plants have taught me that really stays with me his how to compromise and survive adverse forces.  I was standing outside once when I noticed a tree branch blowing in the wind.  I immediately in my head got the sense that the tree branch was trying to teach me something.  It was bending in the wind.  It was going with the wind and being supple and relaxed.  This was helping it to survive the harsh wind.  Had it tried to fight against the wind it could have snapped and broke.  I got the sense that sometimes in life you have to give and be flexible.  If you are too rigid it can actually be detrimental.  To drive this point home as I was walking back to my car after observing this I accidentally stepped on a rigid tree branch and it snapped and broke.  

Also on two different occasions both right before trying times in my life I noticed a tree that had compromised with artificial structures.  The first time was a tree that had grown around a guardrail.  The metal guardrail was actually cutting into this tree but the tree seemed to just keep growing and doing fine.  It had let the guardrail stand and continued doing it's thing.  The second time was a tree and fence.  The tree had grown into the fence so that both structures stood with integrity.  Those of you that watched the TV show Home Improvement may remember the character Wilson sharing a similar story.    

These plants had taught me how to bend and compromise to face adversity in life.  They taught me that sometimes in life you have to concede, sometimes you have to compromise and sometimes you have to stand your ground.  Wisdom is knowing when to do what.       

Know Your Limits

My one dog is extremely fast and agile.  She can fly through a wooded forest like a deer.  However her paws are small for her body size.  This doesn't appear to be a detriment on land and may even help her with her hairpin turns but on water it becomes a weakness.  She found that out the hard way when she tried swimming across a lake.  She only made it out a few feet before she had to turn back realizing she wasn't going to make it across.  By the time she got to land only her snout was sticking out of the water.  Her paws were too small to keep her afloat for very long nor could she swim very fast.  Since then she will only go in water that she can stand in.  She has never tried to swim again.  She knows her limits she is fine running on land and leaving swimming to the fish.

This taught me a very valuable lesson.  Know yourself and be honest with yourself.  Not everyone is going to be good at everything and everyone is good at something.  My dog taught me that you got to know your limits and your skills and be comfortable with both.  We are all unique and that's one of the things that keeps the circle of life moving.  My dog accepted she was not a good swimmer.  She still runs swiftly through the forests zigzagging through trees.  She still works hard at what she is good at and in her mind I am sure she feels she is putting her skills to good use.  I don't think it hurts her self-esteem she just does what she can do the best she can.  

It helps remind me to be open to trying new things and if I find I am not good at them to accept that and concentrate on the things I am good at like my dog does.  We all have skills to offer to the world.  We don't have to be good at everything.  We can just each play our role.  Together we are each a piece of a much larger picture that is this life.    

Dealing With Mistakes

I have always been hard on myself when I make mistakes. I know everyone makes mistakes and nobody is perfect but it still bothers me when I make them.  When I make mistakes I often wish I had a time machine to go back and change things but I can't.  But as I continued on in years it more appeared to me that how we handle our mistakes is more important than not making them.  Mistakes I think build character and help us learn things.  This lesson was hit home for me when I watched a documentary on a lioness.

The lioness in the documentary was pregnant.  Lionesses leave the pride to give birth alone by themselves.  They pick a safe nesting spot to give birth.  This lioness picked a bad spot to give birth it was on top of a snake den.  After her cubs were born the snake bit her cubs and her.  This snake was highly poisonous and the venom killed her cubs and blinded the lionesses.  The lioness was weak, blind and couldn't drink or eat.  The lionesses messed up big she had lost her cubs which was a devastating loss and now her own life was in danger.  You couldn't blame her for throwing in the towel.  How she reacted astonished me and has always stuck with me.  She sniffed her cubs and realized they were dead since she couldn't see.  She was visibly upset and mourned their deaths but pushed on for her own survival.  Her cubs paid the ultimate price but there was nothing she could do to bring them back all she could do was try to survive. She kept moving to prevent the venom from overtaking her.  She was attacked by a group of hyenas.  Hyenas and lions have a bitter feud where they will often attack and try to kill each other.  This group of hyenas certainly could have taken the lioness in her current state and did attack but she fought back.  She showed them that even though she was weakened and had messed up she was going to keep on fighting and she wasn't going to give up.  She demonstrated her will to live and push on.  The hyenas eventually left her alone since she had proven her strength of character.  Eventually she recuperated after a week and regained her sight and could eat and drink again.  She then went back to her pride to rejoin them and continue being a part of her family.

This lionesses made a big mistake in life but she just pushed through and did the best she could.  She couldn't really correct her mistake just survive it's consequences and then learn for next time.  I am sure next time she will be more careful picking a nest site to have her cubs.  She faced the adversity and now knows more about what she can survive.  She is smarter and stronger for it I am sure.  I try to remember her when I make mistakes.  If it is a big mistake I tell myself ok you got bit now fight through it and deal with it.  If I can correct the mistake or improve the situation I try to and whatever is left I just try to survive and make the best of it.  I try to take a moment to assess what I can learn and how to do better next time.  What are some challenges you have faced and had to overcome or mistakes that you made?  I would love to hear them and share.   

Accepting Life

"Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans"-John Lennon

That quote from John Lennon I have found to be very true.  It is so easy to have a plan for your life and for things to change the course of your plan as you go through life.  Sometimes your whole life can change completely in an instant.  Other times you keep redrawing the plans only to have different occurrences happen to make you adjust your plans.  I can't tell you how many times I try to foresee a problem and work it out in my head only to have the problem resolve itself or never present itself because things have changed.  Also there have been many times when I have been stuck in a bad situation and feel hopeless but the situation eventually changes or things are going good only to have an event change everything.  Life is like a kaleidoscope constantly turning and changing.  It's like that line in the Elton John song Can You Feel The Love Tonight "...the twisting kaleidoscope moves us all in turn".  We are all connected on this earth and because of that things are constantly in motion and changing just like a twisting kaleidoscope and we have to accept that.  We can be so much more at peace when we understand that things are one way now and they will change and be another way later.  

My dog drove that point home to me when he had surgery.  He had to where one of those cones they put on pets after surgery cause he went right for the stitches if it was off.  Because of this even on walks he wore it.  However the cone interfered with his ability to sniff the ground and the bushes.  And that is a major problem for him.  He is all about the politics of sniffing out where other dogs have urinated and leaving his own message.  He takes it as a very serious business and I felt bad watching him struggle to sniff and get in the right position to post his own message.  But as I watched him my pity turned to admiration.  He was making due the best he could.  He did not appear to be wallowing in self-pity at his predicament or cursing the fates.  He was just trying to do the best he could with the situation he was given.  He wasn't going to give up he was just going to accept the hand he had been dealt and work with it.  Which became all the more amazing when I realized that he had no way of knowing this was a temporary situation or for how long things were going to be this way.  I knew it was only for a couple weeks but he didn't.  For all he knew this was a long term development.  I realized that he knew that things were once different than they currently are and now he had this new challenge to face and that things were probably going to change again but for right now he would accept what life has presented him with and do the best he can with it.  He was still going to do what he felt was important for him to do and he would just go with the flow.  

Wild animals do this too.  They live by the forces of what nature deals them.  They don't know if they are going to eat today or get eaten themselves.  They may have to fight to defend themselves or their homes might be destroyed.  Any number of things could happen to them as the twisting kaleidoscope continues to turn.  These things could happen to humans but too often we humans build up illusions of control in regards to our life.  We feel we can foresee calamity and control our circumstances but in reality we are also at the whims of the twisting kaleidoscope.  I find it hard but after watching my dog and wild animals go with the flow I try to do the same.  Often I will forget and have to keep reminding myself(my dogs help remind me too along with other animals).  But if we go with the flow and accept the impermanence of life I think it will make us more at peace.  It doesn't mean we don't set out to do things or change things.  My dog still urinated on the bushes, he still did his thing he just accepted what life threw at him and worked with it.  Just like if a lion doesn't catch the gazelle she will simply go after the zebra.  They accept that things are always changing and they will continue to do their thing and face whatever life throws at them.  That's just life to face the challenges while doing our thing the best we can.  Does anyone have some other reminders that you have to go with the flow in life?  Or challenges that had to be overcome?

Healing Our Divide With Nature

I found an article recently about how healthy ecosystems can help with climate change by reducing amounts of CO2.  This article makes sense to me but I am surprised I have not seen more like it.  If we are trying to save the earth we will need to partner with nature to do so.  After all aren’t we and all the inhabitants of this earth part of nature.  Aren’t these environmental issues we are facing such as climate change and extinctions a result of the forces of nature being thrown off balance and disrupted.  Nature’s ability to rebound and create equilibrium should not be underestimated.  The site of the Chernobyl nuclear meltdown is declared a “dead zone” due to nuclear radiation, humans were evacuated and not permitted to re-enter the area.  It has been 25 years and despite what the name implies this area is far from a dead zone.  Wildlife is doing quite well and the ecosystem appears to be thriving.

Now grant it there are still some issues such as mutations but the wildlife is just producing more offspring to counter that and there are problems with plant decomposers but this was an area that was completely radiated after hundreds of years of being farmed and built upon and stripped of any natural wildlife.  If nature could make this strong of a come back at Chernobyl imagine what it can do at other places.  To find an example of a less severe area that nature made a comeback in you only have to look at Yellowstone National Park in the U.S.A. where after humans tried managing the herds of herbivores without much success wolves were reintroduced and the entire ecosystem become more diverse as the wolves changed the entire landscape allowing vegetation to once again flourish and all sorts of organisms to come back to the area and prosper. 

Nature can fix things.  There isn’t necessarily anything mystical about this(unless you prefer to look at things that way).  Our planet is made up of very complex systems such as ecosystems.  It makes sense that the competitive forces and pressures of nature make it so when something isn’t working in the system it goes away or changes eventually until something does start working in the system.  We humans are a part of these systems as well, whether we would like to admit it or not.  We try to control these systems and divide ourselves from nature for various reasons.  We need to heal that divide in ourselves and release the control.  It’s starts on the individual level accepting we are of the earth and part of these systems then when that individual divide is healed it spreads out into our entire species and makes cultural and societal changes.  Humanity can once again work with the systems on this planet rather than fighting or controlling these systems and running into discord.  Earth doesn’t need a savior or a manager.  Earth needs a friend and ally.  Lets heal our relationship to this planet that we come from and call home and stand with nature not above it or below it or against it.  Once we accept that we are part of nature humanity can unlock it’s true potential.  

Living the Moment

It’s tough to stay focused on the present.  Modern society so gears us to look ahead or behind.  For instance, we have to write resumes on past job experiences and we are saving for retirement.  One of the most popular English language songs right now is Adele’s Hello which is about regretting the past and people often ask when are you getting married, when are you buying a house, when are you having kids propelling us along life’s milestones.  How often do we just simply take pleasure on where we currently are in life and take it all in.  The good and the bad.  And say this is life, this is me at this moment in my journey.  Non-human animals on this planet do not seem to be as pre-occupied with the future or the past.  They seem to be very present minded and in the moment and perhaps can help us accept the current moment more.  The spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle says in his book the Power of Now how his cat is a great teacher of staying mindful in the present moment and he even co-authored a book with Mutt’s creator Patrick McDonnell called Guardians of Being on how pets help humans who live with them stay present minded.  This present mindfulness is often times attributed to lower brain functions but as this great article points out animals seem to be happier and more at peace while staying in the moment so maybe we should be imitating that more in our daily lives so we can be happier and more peaceful.   

Animals certainly remember things and use past experiences.  They don’t just blindly disregard the past.  They learn from it and accept it.  Your pet knows who you are and doesn’t meet you again for the first time when you come home everyday.  Your cat knows how to get belly rubs from you or not to scratch the sofa(or at least not to do it while you are looking).  Your dog knows when dinnertime is and not to go into the garbage(again at least while you are not looking).  Your pets learn from behaviors and routines.  My dogs know the instant we enter the vet office that bad stuff is going to happen.  But seem hopeful that anytime they go on a car ride without the other dog a good destination awaits even though they almost always only ride in the car without the other dog when going to the vet.  Wild animals learn as well.  They have to learn how to hunt and/or avoid predators.  They learn what is dangerous.  If they are social animals they learn social skills.  They learn from the past but they know the present moment is ever changing.  If another member of their group is in a bad mood they may avoid that member or fight but they can make up later often very quickly.  In a documentary two Japanese macaques fight and then reconcile quickly.  You can see this at about the twenty minute mark.  This is the kind of forgive and forget attitude that is often taken by animals in regards to social interactions or past mistakes.  I am sure repeated ill treatment would have repercussions but they know each moment is a new painting of life.  They pick up trends but fluctuations are taken as what makes each moment special and handled according to the circumstances of the instant.  Animals are ever present to handle these fluctuations and pick up on what is a trend and what is a momentary circumstance remaining optimistic for the best.

Animals seem not to dwell on the future either.  Animals in civilized society can’t.  If you bring your dog to be boarded it has no knowledge of how long it will be there.  It must take each day as is.  It has no control over how life unfolds just like all animals in society.  Wild animals don’t have any control either.  They do not know from moment to moment if they will be chased by a predator and hunters don’t know when they will catch a meal.  If a lioness leaves her cubs in a hiding spot to go hunt the cubs do not know if they will ever see her again.  An elephant does not know when she will die she does not go for yearly check ups at the doctor to see if she is healthy.  Death is always a possiblity.  Many if not all animals surely know they will one day die.  Cape buffalo will try and rescue one of their own from a lion and will try to kill lion cubs.  If they didn’t know what death was they wouldn’t try to rescue their own or kill their enemy.  The lioness in Disney’s African Cats got mortally wounded and afterwards got one of her pride mates to take care of her daughter and then went off to a secluded spot to die.  She had to know she was going to pass away from this life based on her actions.  Christian the lion laid by the grave of his friend Boyd when he passed and was visibly distraught.  Tarra the elephant carried her dog friend Bella when she died and appeared to be in mourning.  Animals certainly seem to know that living things can die.  Their is no evidence that they would think themselves immortal.  They most likely don’t know the mechanisms behind death and why it occurs just like up until Newton we didn't know why things fell to the ground but humans certainly knew before him if they jumped off a cliff they would fall.  Animals also probably don’t know what happens after death but in truth, although many firmly believe they do, humans have no definitive proof of what happens either outside our faith in our beliefs.  I think the reason we sometimes think animals don’t know they are going to die is because they don’t dwell on it.  They accept death will happen someday but for now they are alive and they will live each moment the best they can.  They know they have no control over life outside of how they live their own life day to day moment by moment.  They know the future can bring a myriad of events and circumstances and one day they will pass from this life.  But they can accept that and take each moment as it comes and do the best they can with it.  They know they are alive now and in a minute they may not be but that is in the future for now they will do the best with the present.  

I struggle with going with the flow and letting go of past hurt.  I have gotten better over the years but it's a continuing process.  I do believe that going with the flow makes for a happier life though based on my experiences.  I welcome others to share their experiences with this.  It is a tough thing to accept you have no control but if we can accept it and just do the best we can with the present moment we are given and let the future unfold as it must and let the past be our teacher and not our master maybe we can find the peace we need.  

Different Perspectives

It is tough to look at things from another’s perspective.  So much goes into our point of view which in turn influences our behavior.  We are influenced from various different sources such as biological make up, culture, personal experiences, ect.  See this article that discusses how an individual's behavior can be complicated.  

My dog’s have always helped remind me to try and look at things from other perspectives.  Sure when I am walking them and it’s rainy weather and they are sniffing a patch of grass or a bush for what seems like and an eternity it easy for me to say come on you two let’s head home.  But then I remember that they are probably wondering at times how I can stare at a computer screen for hours at a time(especially when no little critters are running around on it).  In a dog’s world scent is the primary sense for them just like humans are primarily visual.  To a dog they live in a world of smells.  That patch of grass they are sniffing may contain tons of information.  To them I would imagine it would be similar to checking Facebook or Twitter.  And the rain may not bother them as much since they have a coat of fur.  So for them standing out in the rain sniffing a patch of grass with scent markings from other animals is probably similar to us sitting inside watching the evening news or checking what’s trending.  So most times I catch myself and stand in the rain and let them sniff their bush on the condition they allow me to blog of course :)

Human beings are so vastly different from one another and we share the same genes.  Imagine how much of a different perspective you get from an animal that has a different biological make up.  I always liked the story Temple Grandin relates in her book "Animals In Translation" of a lion being transported on a plane that was given a pillow to sleep on.  The lion ate the pillow and died which was a sad outcome.  But Temple's point that the lion isn’t going to know what to do with a pillow and will try to see if it can be eaten but he probably would have liked some grass or hay to comfortably lie down in was insightful.  It wasn’t that the lion was stupid or did not want to be comfortable like a human would want it just had a different perspective than humans on how to go about doing that.  We need to always step out of our own perspectives occasionally so we can realize the different ways to look at the world and come to a better understanding on how all the organisms that share this earth can get along.  So I always welcome the opportunity to interact with humans and non-humans from different cultures and backgrounds and expand my horizons.  

Our differences I also find highlight our commonalities.  Our common desires to live life and follow our paths in the pursuit of what makes us happy.  Animals and plants especially jolt you.  By their vast differences they highlight the universal truths of living beings.  Having a conversation on how we each see the world even without language I feel will help us better handle this mosaic we call life.  Please feel free to share some unique perspectives or ways of doing things or looking at things.  I would love to hear them and discuss :)

Kitty Rejection

When I was a little kid my parents had a cat.  I always wanted to pet the cat.  She always ran away from me.  I would chase after her and my parents would tell me to leave her alone.  My grandparents had a cat as well and whenever I was over their house I would try to pet the cat but there cat didn’t like to be petted and would swat at me.  I would persist and eventually seeing that I was not getting the message the cat would eventually bite me.  When I told my grandparents the cat bit me they would tell me that is his way of saying leave me alone.  I would never listen to my parents or grandparents and would continually be rejected by these cats.

But as I grew older I realized these cats were right and that not everyone likes everyone.  Throughout life I always wanted to be liked by everyone and would be upset if people didn’t like me or if we just didn’t hit it off and get along great.  Even the rejection of the cats stuck with me.  But I began to realize as I got older that I needed to just be comfortable with myself and like myself the rest would take care of itself.  Motivational speaker and author Louise Hay speaks of this concept of loving yourself and that when you love and accept yourself your “relationships either improve, or the negative ones dissolve and new ones begin.”  I think that is true because it makes simple sense as part of the nature of relationships.  When you accept yourself you are more at ease in your relationships and comfortable and others pick up on that and in turn feel more comfortable and at ease.  And as you gain more confidence in yourself and your healthy relationships you can let go of the unhealthy relationships.  We are social beings after all so we need relationships to thrive a recent study just showed that.  We only have a finite time in this life so we need to choose how we spend our time and who we spend it with wisely.

The cats of my early childhood may have simply not liked me because I didn’t know how to approach them or maybe they just didn’t like me because they didn’t like me but either way they had the right to choose who to spend time with just like we all do.  Although it may be painful we all have to choose who to spend our time with on this earth and accept the consequences of those choice after all it is our life.  And believe me I know the pain of rejection or dissolving unhealthy relationships it is not easy but we have to respect others who choose not to spend time with us and we have to respect ourselves to choose who we spend time with.  Some people just don’t mix with others for whatever reason the connection just doesn’t happen for one or both parties.  But with so many different people out there connections will happen it is the natural course of things just make sure you are in a good place and the rest will happen naturally.  Has anyone struggled with rejection or breaking away from destructive relationships out there?  I would very much like to hear and share feelings and experiences with this since I know it can be a difficult thing to navigate.

Unexpected Teachers

Ken S. Keyes, Jr. was an American writer quoted as saying “Everyone and everything around you is your teacher.”  I couldn’t agree more and have tried to live my life by that philosophy.  I have been very fortunate and am thankful to have had many great teachers over the course of my life time.  Both human and non-human.  My first big non human teacher was a silverfish or most likely several silverfish.  For those of you not familiar with that organism here is a link. Enjoy :)

You see when I was a child I would often find one crawling around my bathroom. Whenever I was in the bathroom and saw one I didn’t run out of the bathroom in fright or immediately grab a tissue or a can of bug spray.  Instead I watched them.  I just observed and when I observed them I saw something behind just a reactionary machine.  Something deep down inside of me said there is something else there.  An intelligence of a sort. There was an interplay between that organism and the world that the silverfish existed in. They taught me to observe the non-human inhabitants of this planet in addition to the human ones and how they interacted with the world they found themselves in.  As I observed I noticed insights and wisdom.  I have always been thankful to the silverfish for being the first to teach me to pay attention to all organisms for I was able to learn many lessons that have helped me through life and gain new perspectives.  I am thankful for the opportunity to share them with you and I welcome you to share with me any lessons you have learned from those around you as well so together we can grow on this journey that we call life.